In brief
Divorce with children refers to a divorce involving minor children, for which the law imposes additional obligations on both parents.
- In a divorce involving minor children, a parenting plan is legally required. This document establishes agreements regarding parental authority, residence, and the provision of information.
- In most cases, both parents retain joint parental authority over the children after a divorce, unless the court decides otherwise.
- The division of care and upbringing is established in a contact arrangement or co-parenting arrangement, depending on the situation of both parents.
- The financial contribution of a parent toward the costs of care and upbringing is settled through child support.
- Depending on the circumstances, a divorce with children can be finalized through consultation, mediation, or legal proceedings.
The parenting plan: what is it and what does it contain?
When there are minor children, a parenting plan is legally required. The parenting plan is submitted to the court along with the divorce petition and contains at least the following agreements:
- The division of care and upbringing tasks: who has the children and when?
- How both parents inform each other about important matters concerning the children.
- The manner in which parents consult with each other regarding decisions about the children.
- The amount of child support: the financial contribution of a parent toward the children’s costs.
The parenting plan can be drawn up in mutual consultation, through mediation, or determined by the court if the parties cannot reach an agreement. In many cases, a carefully drafted parenting plan leads to fewer conflicts in the long term.
Parental authority after a divorce
In the Netherlands, parents generally exercise parental authority over their children jointly, even after a divorce. Joint parental authority means that both parents remain involved in important decisions regarding the upbringing, school, medical care, and place of residence of the children.
Only in exceptional situations does the court grant sole parental authority to one parent. In many cases, the court assesses whether joint parental authority is in the best interests of the child, even when the relationship between the parents is strained.
Depending on the circumstances, the court may also impose an information arrangement, whereby the parent without daily care is entitled to information about the child.
Co-parenting or a contact arrangement: what suits your situation?
The division of daily care for children after a divorce can be organized in various ways.
Co-parenting
In co-parenting, the children stay with both parents to an equal or near-equal extent. This requires good cooperation between parents and a stable situation on both sides. Co-parenting is not appropriate in all cases; the age of the children, the living situation, and the mutual relationship all play a role.
Contact arrangement
When the children have their main residence with one parent, a contact arrangement is established for the time the children spend with the other parent. The arrangement is tailored to the age and needs of the children. In many cases, the court assesses what is in the best interests of the child if the parents cannot reach an agreement themselves.
Would you like to know which division best suits your situation? A divorce lawyer helps in establishing agreements that are legally sound and align with the situation of both parents and the children.
Child support: how is the contribution calculated?
After a divorce, a parent who provides less or no care for the children is obliged to make a financial contribution to the costs of care and upbringing. This contribution is called child support.
The amount of child support is calculated based on two factors: the needs of the child and the financial capacity of both parents. In the Netherlands, the calculation uses the Trema standards—guidelines applied by the courts.
Would you like an indication of the child support in your situation? Use the calculate child support tool, or discuss your situation in a consultation.
Alimony is not a fixed amount. Depending on circumstances—such as a change in income or the living arrangement—a request for modification or recalculation can be submitted.
What is the procedure for a divorce with children?
A divorce with children largely follows the same procedure as a regular divorce, but with additional steps regarding the parenting plan.
- Orientation: determining which agreements regarding children and finances are necessary.
- Drafting the parenting plan: through consultation, mediation, or the court.
- Submitting the divorce petition to the court, with the parenting plan attached.
- Court ruling and registration of the divorce.
- Implementation of the agreements and, if necessary, adjustment in case of changed circumstances.
Would you like to know how the procedure works in your situation? Contact us; it is for orientation purposes and without obligation.
What if parents cannot reach an agreement together?
When parents cannot agree on the parenting plan, the contact arrangement, or child support, the court can make a decision. Each parent is then represented by their own lawyer.
In such cases, the court assesses what is in the best interests of the child, whereby the well-being of the children carries more weight than the wishes of the parents. In many cases, the court also advises engaging a parenting or contact counselor.
Are you stuck in negotiations? Discuss your situation with a divorce lawyer. Depending on the circumstances, several routes are possible—from renewed consultation to legal proceedings.
Divorce with children and an international component
When one or both parents have a different nationality or live abroad, a divorce with children involves additional legal complexity. Questions regarding the jurisdiction of the court, applicable law, and the recognition of agreements in other countries then play a role.
A specific situation is international child abduction or relocation, where a parent wishes to move abroad with the children. This requires consent from the other parent or a court decision. For more information, see the international family law page.
In international matters concerning children, a second opinion from a specialized lawyer is often useful.
Based on Real Cases
Parenting plan in case of a difference of opinion
In one case, Simmelink Lawyers assisted a client in a divorce where both parents had a different division of care in mind. One wanted co-parenting, while the other did not see it as feasible given the work schedules.
By carefully mapping out the situation and taking the interests of the children as a starting point, an arrangement could be established that was workable for both parents and legally sound.
Recalculation of child support after a change in income
A client contacted us after a change in his income situation. The previously established child support no longer matched the new circumstances. In such a case, the legal framework is important: a request for modification is possible when there are changed circumstances that the court could not foresee at the time. Depending on the circumstances, there are several routes possible to adjust the child support.
Are you unsure about the best course of action in your situation?
Schedule an appointment with us.
Our Attorneys at Law
At Simmelink Lawyers, you work with lawyers specialized in family law, international family law, and inheritance law. We work intensively together on solutions that are legally sound and do personal justice to your situation.
Carla Simmelink – Family Law Attorney, International Family Law and Inheritance Law
Family Law Attorney, International Family Law and Inheritance Law
Valerie Lingg – Family Law Attorney, International Family Law
Family Law Attorney, International Family Law
Eva Zaunbrecher-Boschloo – Family Law Attorney, International Family Law
Lawyer at Law (International) Family Law
Clients are guided by a dedicated lawyer who oversees the entire file and communicates discreetly.
Frequently Asked Questions
Yes. In a divorce involving minor children, a parenting plan is legally required. The plan is submitted along with the divorce petition. Without a parenting plan, the court cannot process the petition. If parents cannot reach an agreement themselves, the court will establish the plan.
In most cases, both parents retain joint parental authority over the children after the divorce. This does not change automatically due to a divorce.
Sole parental authority is only granted when joint parental authority is demonstrably contrary to the best interests of the child.
This is general information; every situation requires its own assessment.
When a parent does not comply with the established contact arrangement, there are legal means to enforce compliance. In many cases, the court assesses whether there are grounds for a penalty payment or a modification of the arrangement.
Depending on the circumstances, conciliation or mediation can also be a first step. A lawyer can advise which route is most appropriate in your situation.
Moving abroad with minor children is only possible with the consent of the other parent or with a court decision. Without this consent, a move can be classified as international child abduction. Depending on the circumstances and the interests of the children, the court assesses whether the request will be granted.
The amount of child support is calculated based on the needs of the children and the financial capacity of both parents. Dutch courts use the Trema standards for this purpose.
The calculation depends on income, housing costs, and the division of care. This is general information; the exact calculation varies per situation.
